


Waiting For Something That May Never Come

by TN_Night



Series: #EruriWeek2015 [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Choices, Coma, Eruri Week, Hospitals, I'm Sorry, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sad, To Be Edited, crying levi, yet - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 18:58:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4490982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TN_Night/pseuds/TN_Night
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is forced to make one of the biggest decisions of his life.</p><p>Part of Eruri Week 2015, Day 2: Choice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting For Something That May Never Come

**Author's Note:**

> Hello~ So again I say I will most likely be editing and adding to these fics (from Eruri Week) later in the future, but for the current moment, this is what's up. Sorry 'bout any mistakes! These are unbeta'd and I don't even think I looked this one over at all. I'll be back from my vacation on the 8th, I'll take the 9th to chill out and unpack, so I'll edit and add shit on the 10th and so on. Anyway, enjoy~
> 
> Also, I know nothing about comas and I wrote this at 3am. Whoops.

 

 

Levi stared blankly at the wall beside the door, straight across from where he was sitting currently, next to his husband's hospital bed– a place he's been continually resting during visiting hours for over five years now. 

 

His all too familiar routine happened nearly everyday; Levi would enter the hospital quietly, ignoring the sympathetic stares from nurses and doctors who'd known him for way longer than they should've, and walk up to the room his loved one inhabited. He would sit down in the uncomfortable chair next to the beeping machines and the white sterile sheets, proceeding to try to talk to the man in the bed, but only ending up crying after a few sentences. He usually spent the rest of their available time together staring at the wall ahead, trying to hold back the sobs that occasionally threatened. 

 

 _"I can barely remember his voice,"_ Levi thought, not particularly caring that he was crying again when he could see the door slowly being opened out of his peripheral line of view.

 

 _"Mr. Smith?"_ He heard faintly in the back of his head, only reminding him again that the original holder of that name hadn't moved so much as an inch in the past several years. 

 

"Mr. Smith?" The voice called again, and this time, he looked up to meet the stare of the doctor he'd gotten well acquainted with over his time spent here. 

 

"Yes?"

 

"May I speak with you for a moment?" He inquired, motioning towards the door.

 

Levi seemed hesitant for a second, his eyes darting between his husband and the aforementioned door in a hurried worry, wondering if he should choose to hear what was most likely going to be bad news or stay blissfully unaware next to the one he couldn't lose. Even after even a few minutes of the stretched out silence and the extensive amount of pondering Levi still wasn't fully convinced he wanted to leave with the doctor, but he knew he probably had to at some point, so he decided to be braver than he felt and went with the other man, leaving the man in the bed to lay unmoving. 

 

The two wandered into the doctor's office, Levi sitting down as the other man closed the door behind them.

 

"So, Dr. Zackly, what did you want to discuss?" The younger man started, keeping his voice as even and professional as he could.

 

The doctor sat down on the other side of the desk in a black office chair, placing his elbows on the desk and resting his chin on his hands, "I think it's about time we started talking about whether or not we should continue treatment on your husband." 

 

Levi's heart dropped into his stomach and he winced; he'd sort of expected the question to be brought up sooner or later, he'd just hoped Erwin would wake up before anyone ever had the chance to try. 

 

"He's been on life support for about five years now, and we're bordering on six. Depending on the extremity of the patient's case and whether or not the person has given consent before being hooked up to the life aid plays a hand in situations like this, and since Mr. Smith hadn't had time to think on the options himself, we leave it up to close relatives like yourself to decide on the matter," the doctor explained.

 

"How long do I have to make my decision?" The other said, rubbing the bridge of his nose in hope to alleviate his oncoming headache. 

 

"You can take as much time as you need, but I can see how much stress this whole thing has put on you, please do remember to take care of yourself, Levi."

 

Said man nodded, standing back up and heading for the door again, making his way down the hall and back to the place where he knew nothing had changed. 

 

––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

 

It'd been weeks since the question was brought up, he'd had weeks to think about pretty much killing his husband of over ten years, the only one he'd ever truly loved. He'd forced himself not to go to the hospital for the past while, figuring if anything happened someone would contact him,  just so he could think things through without distraction. The first night he'd really given it any thought he'd seriously been considering the option of pulling his plug– Erwin would never've wanted to live through machines his life, and he wouldn't've wanted Levi to waste his own life coming down all the time just to be met with the same depressing sight over and over again. 

 

But while the first night was spent thinking about how Erwin would've wanted this to turn out, he couldn't help but think selfishly for all the other nights he'd been going over the options. He didn't want to be the one to kill the man he loved, even if technically it still would've been the drunk driver that rammed him in the first place all those years ago's fault. 

 

Along with all the thoughts of not wanting to be the murderer of his husband came floods of many of the old suppressed memories he'd had of the two of them together. Their wedding, first date, all their travels together that they'd decided to take while they were young and still able to. Which was a pretty funny thought, now that he really looked back on it, considering they were still both young now– it just went to show that age doesn't always display the picture of health.  

 

In the end he told Dr. Zackly he wanted to continue the life support. He simply couldn't give up after all the time he'd waited, after all the time he'd sat patiently in that irritatingly pristine pearl white room. He just couldn't give up on his family, on the one he promised to stay with forever and cherish. 

 

And so he continued his routine.

 

He came in for the first time in a while, ignoring the now nearly condescending looks he got. Walking up to that forsaken room. Trudging his way into the elevator and up to one of the higher floors. Dragging his feet down the un-scuffed, newly cleaned hallways. Nearly tripping and falling flat on his face when he saw multiple doctors and nurses threading in and out of the room he was making his way towards. Letting his tears flow freely and covering his mouth with his hand when he saw his husband with one eye barely cracked open.

 

_That was one choice he would never not be grateful for._

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
